Catholic footballer calls religion into question after missing open goal
BARCELONA - 18 year-old sensation Bojan Krkic has questioned his Catholic faith after failing to score the winning goal in the Champions League Semi-Final against Chelsea at the Nou Camp last night.
With only three minutes left to play in injury time and the score precariously balanced at 0-0, Bojan freed himself from his marker and headed wide when it looked impossible for him to miss. “That’s a goal God would have normally helped me score,” a visibly shocked Bojan told reporters after the game. “I don’t know what happened. I crossed my chest as i came onto the pitch, so this doesn’t really make sense.”
Despite war, famine and poverty, what God really wants is for Bojan to play a good game
Other Barcelona players comforted Bojan after the game, reassuring him that God still loved him, and desperately wanted only success for Barcelona and Spain. Said Barcelona coach Pep Guardiola; “He was pretty down in the changing room [after the game]. We reassured him that if God didn’t love him, he’d just be a normal person, probably working in an office or cleaning the streets of roadkill or something.”
“I’m going to prey twice as hard from now on, go to confession twice a day, only use a condom on one night stands, and sacrifice a lamb on the pitch before our game against Real Madrid on Saturday. Maybe then God will make me score”
The final result was 0-0. If anyone cares. God probably doesn’t as he declined to comment.
Comments
By Smith&Co on April 29th, 2009 at 12:08 pm
i take it you don’t like soccer? Or Catholics?
By Steve-o on April 29th, 2009 at 5:24 pm
i fucking care. chelsea at home 2-1
By Latino2105 on April 30th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
i loled a few times at this one btw!
it does annoy me when baseball players thank God for striking someone out or something. i wonder if they curse him if they give up a HR.
By peachmama on May 3rd, 2009 at 7:19 am
i just ate a catholic.
By Admin on May 12th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
^^ LOL. ummmm tasty.
By me here on September 3rd, 2009 at 4:19 am
dude, god doesnt works like that, what if cech was catholic and he have crossed himself too, then god would be in a dilema
By admin on September 3rd, 2009 at 10:55 am
^^ “God would be in a dilemma”
Thats the point isn’t it? From a sporting prospective its just stupid to expect devine assistance. Especially if the opponent shares the same religious ideology.