T5: Air quality results rendered useless as pollution melts monitoring device
HEATHROW - Air quality monitoring devices spread strategically around the new Terminal 5 runway at Heathrow Airport have produced inconclusive evidence of excessive pollution because they have all melted. “Once we’d found them through all the smog it was evident they were unlikely to yield any notable results” Explained Bruce Boulter,
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Mysterious poltergeist turns out to be progressive alzheimers in homeowner
BRISTOL - Experts in paranormal phenomenon were called to a house in Bradley Stoke after a spate of personal items had systematically moved unaided from one room to another. Retired legal clerk and homeowner Harry Burnham, 78, called police after the supposed poltergeist of his ex-wife had sent him
Japanese robotic teacher needs to be profanity, kick and piss proof, says British education minister
BRISTOL – Scientists at Bristol University have been busy adapting the latest technological advancement from Japan, in a bid to make it a success in schools across Britain. The robotic humanoid, named Saya, was created by Hiroshi Kobayashi at the University of Tokyo in a bid to provide children in
Plane grounded as autopilot three times over the legal alcohol limit
HEATHROW – United Airlines flight 352, which was scheduled to fly from London to New York was refused take-off after reports that the autopilot was three times over the legal alcohol limit. The Autopilot, known only as ‘The Autopilot’, was first suspected of being drunk as the Boeing 747
Brook gives boyfriend Cipriani cold shoulder after seeing him in HD
Busty model and actress Kelly Brook has been reported to be giving new boyfriend - Wasps and England fly-half Danny Cipriani - the cold shoulder after seeing his facial features enhanced in crystal clear quality live on a Sony plasma 56 inch flat screen in super high-def. Cipriani
Man completes game after 23 years
DEADEND - A man has gone into the record books this week after taking 23 years to complete a computer game.
Leslie Olson of Deadend, Bristol told of his torment and subsequent joy at completing the game, raising his blistered hands and fingers in the air and fisting defiantly to mocking neighbours.